squatty's training log

Squatty · 19-09-2006, 03:26 PM

Feel absolutely terrible today. This "test flu" has knocked me for six and left me drained of energy. The latest prop shot has left me with a bad site pain that feels like I've been kicked in the arse and leg by a racehorse and woke up three times in the night sweating buckets.

Went to the gym this morning,more out of habit than anything else but had no strength, energy or enthusiasm. Was meant to train back and did about 25 minutes and called it a day. Coach had suggested we took some progress pics today but I blew him out.

Two nagging questions running through my head all day: "what the f**k am I doing to my body" and "what the f**k is this all for" and at the moment I can't come up with any answers to either.

Sorry this sounds so negative but I vowed that I would include the shit in my journal as well as the good stuff

Nick500 · 19-09-2006, 03:55 PM

Chin up buddy, what the **** are you doing to your body? Making it monstrous. What the **** is it all for? To prove to yourself and others that you have the dedication and perserverence that less than 1% of the population have.

Nick

**LeeB** · 19-09-2006, 04:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Squatty

Two nagging questions running through my head all day: "what the f**k am I doing to my body" and "what the f**k is this all for" and at the moment I can't come up with any answers to either.

its called bodybuilding squatty... stop your moaning.. eat your chicken and dig deep... youll come out the other side bigger and better and knowing more about beating adversity mate!!

ive had a sh*t few days... so the headphones are on tonight... ill be welcommed to the jungle and well well well my michelle nobody had better try and interrupt my session!!!

dig deep bud!

Squatty · 19-09-2006, 04:09 PM

Thanks for the support guys - a few days ago I would have been saying and thinking exactly the same thing. At the moment I can't get my head round that I feel so bad because of what I've put into my body in order to get monstrous. And if this is adversity - its self inflicted adversity.

Sorry guys, I know you're looking out for me and I don't mean to be such a c**t. But this feels bigger than my usual "you're not good enough" bollocks - I suppose I'm questioning what I'm actually doing this for.

**LeeB** · 19-09-2006, 04:34 PM

why are you doing this mate?

i always find music helps with motivation... a few years back i had a very hard decision to make at work... which meant me putting my job on the line to stick up for a colleague who was being treated unfairly... i knew i wanted to do it but found it really hard to actually take the first steps and get fully into it.... then was flicking over channels on the radio and a song came on with the words... "i decided long ago that id never walk in anyones shadow"... dont know what the song was... but it brought back memories of why i decide to be the person i am... and it made my mind up for me!

Squatty · 19-09-2006, 05:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LeeB

why are you doing this mate?

i always find music helps with motivation... a few years back i had a very hard decision to make at work... which meant me putting my job on the line to stick up for a colleague who was being treated unfairly... i knew i wanted to do it but found it really hard to actually take the first steps and get fully into it.... then was flicking over channels on the radio and a song came on with the words... "i decided long ago that id never walk in anyones shadow"... dont know what the song was... but it brought back memories of why i decide to be the person i am... and it made my mind up for me!

Lee, you b*stard - you've made my eyes fill up. So if music is the key I'd better go and put my Steps cd on.

Seriously though - thanks mate

**LeeB** · 20-09-2006, 09:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Squatty

Lee, you b*stard - you've made my eyes fill up.

wouldnt be the first time ive made your eyes water sweetie!! :shock:

Squatty · 20-09-2006, 03:05 PM

Do you think the universe is trying to tell me something.

I got off the bus this morning on the way to the gym. The bus was packed with schoolkids all blocking the exit door. After kicking a few of them out of the way, I squeezed through a small gap and ending up jumping off the bus, landing one foot on the pavement and one in the road. I stumbled and fell headlong into one of those small advertisment boards. I'm laying face down on top of this board and the advertisment read:

"Stock Take Your Life Today.
Don't forget what is important in your life"

God knows what was being advertised but I've spent the whole day stock taking, including taking stock of my bodybuilding. And what is important to me is going to the gym, setting and beating the challenges I set myself and having the dedication and balls to stick at something.

Now whether that includes the drugs, competing etc I still need to take stock of but I feel a lot clearer than I have the last few days.

Squatty · 20-09-2006, 04:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LeeB

Quote:

Originally Posted by Squatty

Lee, you b*stard - you've made my eyes fill up.

wouldnt be the first time ive made your eyes water sweetie!! :shock:

Lee - don't think I'm running away from that side of my sexuality but I think you're confusing me with someone else. Didn't you once have an encounter with Mr Bean? I suppose if you were blindfolded at the time and felt something wet on your face, you could have assumed you made his eyes water.

Sorry mate, it wasn't me

Mind, if you're going to Nottingham for the finals I shall be in room 101 in the Crown Plaza Motel (200 yards from the abbatoir)

**LeeB** · 20-09-2006, 04:16 PM

along with billy, 65 from humberside by any chance??? lol

19-09-2006, 03:55 PM	#102 (permalink)
Nick500 Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Bristol Posts: 3,230 Rep Power:	Chin up buddy, what the ** are you doing to your body? Making it monstrous. What the ** is it all for? To prove to yourself and others that you have the dedication and perserverence that less than 1% of the population have. Nick ______________________ - Obsession is what lazy people call dedication -

19-09-2006, 04:34 PM	#105 (permalink)
LeeB Moderator Musclechat Icon Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 1,940 Rep Power:	why are you doing this mate? i always find music helps with motivation... a few years back i had a very hard decision to make at work... which meant me putting my job on the line to stick up for a colleague who was being treated unfairly... i knew i wanted to do it but found it really hard to actually take the first steps and get fully into it.... then was flicking over channels on the radio and a song came on with the words... "i decided long ago that id never walk in anyones shadow"... dont know what the song was... but it brought back memories of why i decide to be the person i am... and it made my mind up for me! ______________________ If your not a part of the greatest... you got to be the greatest yourself! For the best supplements: www.extremenutrition.co.uk

20-09-2006, 04:16 PM	#110 (permalink)
LeeB Moderator Musclechat Icon Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 1,940 Rep Power:	along with billy, 65 from humberside by any chance??? lol ______________________ If your not a part of the greatest... you got to be the greatest yourself! For the best supplements: www.extremenutrition.co.uk

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19-09-2006, 03:26 PM	#101 (permalink)
Squatty Legend Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: www.counselling-for-men.co.uk Posts: 651 Rep Power:	Feel absolutely terrible today. This "test flu" has knocked me for six and left me drained of energy. The latest prop shot has left me with a bad site pain that feels like I've been kicked in the arse and leg by a racehorse and woke up three times in the night sweating buckets. Went to the gym this morning,more out of habit than anything else but had no strength, energy or enthusiasm. Was meant to train back and did about 25 minutes and called it a day. Coach had suggested we took some progress pics today but I blew him out. Two nagging questions running through my head all day: "what the fk am I doing to my body" and "what the fk is this all for" and at the moment I can't come up with any answers to either. Sorry this sounds so negative but I vowed that I would include the shit in my journal as well as the good stuff

19-09-2006, 04:09 PM	#104 (permalink)
Squatty Legend Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: www.counselling-for-men.co.uk Posts: 651 Rep Power:	Thanks for the support guys - a few days ago I would have been saying and thinking exactly the same thing. At the moment I can't get my head round that I feel so bad because of what I've put into my body in order to get monstrous. And if this is adversity - its self inflicted adversity. Sorry guys, I know you're looking out for me and I don't mean to be such a c**t. But this feels bigger than my usual "you're not good enough" bollocks - I suppose I'm questioning what I'm actually doing this for.

20-09-2006, 03:05 PM	#108 (permalink)
Squatty Legend Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: www.counselling-for-men.co.uk Posts: 651 Rep Power:	Do you think the universe is trying to tell me something. I got off the bus this morning on the way to the gym. The bus was packed with schoolkids all blocking the exit door. After kicking a few of them out of the way, I squeezed through a small gap and ending up jumping off the bus, landing one foot on the pavement and one in the road. I stumbled and fell headlong into one of those small advertisment boards. I'm laying face down on top of this board and the advertisment read: "Stock Take Your Life Today. Don't forget what is important in your life" God knows what was being advertised but I've spent the whole day stock taking, including taking stock of my bodybuilding. And what is important to me is going to the gym, setting and beating the challenges I set myself and having the dedication and balls to stick at something. Now whether that includes the drugs, competing etc I still need to take stock of but I feel a lot clearer than I have the last few days.