Temprature in Scotland... (for Doug)

Sherlock

Made me chuckle - from one of the Plastic Jocks...

40 degrees - Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People in Scotland sunbathe.

35 degrees - Italian cars won't start.
People in Scotland drive with the windows down.

20 degrees - Floridians wear coats, gloves, and wool hats.
People in Scotland throw on a T-shirt.

15 degrees - Californians begin to evacuate the state.
People in Scotland go swimming in the sea.

0 degrees - New York landlords turn the heat on.
People in Scotland have a last barby before it gets cold.

-10 degrees - People in Miami are extinct.
People in Scotland lick flagpoles.

-20 degrees - Californians all now live in Mexico.
People in Scotland throw on a light jacket.

-80 degrees - Polar bears begin to evacuate the Artic.
Scottish Boy Scouts postpone winter survival exercise until it gets cold enough.

-100 degrees - Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
People in Scotland wear a vest and pull down their ear flaps.

-173 degrees - Ethyl alcohol freezes.
People in Scotland are angry 'cos they can't thaw their whisky kegs.

-297 degrees - Microbial life starts to grind to a halt.
Scottish cows complain of farmers with cold hands.

-460 degrees - ALL atomic motion stops.
People in Scotland start saying " A bit hill billy ... eh? "

-500 degrees - Hell freezes over.
Scottish people support England in the World Cup

Extreme

Now Darren that could be taken as racist and we could all be offended north of the border!

But as a nation of Buckfast drinking pot smokers we wont remember you upset us for long! Why do you think we haven't invaded England after hundreds of years of sh1t at the hands of English Kings, Queens and Prime Ministers!

Dinosaur

Correct me if im wrong was it not a Scottish King who betrayed his own in the end.

Dino

Extreme

It depends upon your outlook, from some angles he did betray the aspirations of many Scots but it meant the unification of the crowns and ended war between the nations thus making Scotland safe from invasion/attack from England with their significantly larger armies.

The Scots only have themselves to blame, or their leaders more so, the greed for personal gain stopped them from ending the injustices and persecution many Scots suffered in those times.

In more modern times we got stuffed with the "Poll Tax" and have to endure crap roads with no bloody lights on the motorways!

www.extremenutrition.co.uk

Dinosaur

Dont forget the HMO Housing in Multiple Occupation scheme. Its funny when something new comes out they trial it in Scotland first.

As you can guess im a landlord and this goverment is making it impossible, i also have a mortgage company and again we now find ourselfs regulated very heavily by the FSA. It seems no matter what i do regulation catches up with me.

Red tape all around Britain, no good.

Dino

LeeB

and there was berti vogts!!! lol

LeeB

and there was berti vogts!!! lol

someone was taking the p*ss with that one!!

zara-leoni

Never mind the politics and the history...... that was funny!!