What would you do in my position?

zx9rjas.

Hi guys. I must warn you this is going to be a long thread before you start reading it. lol

Dunno where to start? Right, I'm 28 and my girlfriend is 42 (doesn't look 42 cos she is fit and trains)

She is seperated from her husband for 5 years but both share the same house still as they have a shared mortgage. She has a 19 year old son and a 12 year old daughter. She is desperately unhappy at home and does not get on at all with her husband and she cant wait to get away from her piss head son.

Before she met me she was seeing a 52 year old married man, the married man dumped her and went back to his wife. Then he wanted to see her again then dumped her again for his wife. My girlfriend had enough of him by this point, obviously.
A month or so later, I started seeing her and that was fine until this married man said he wanted to be with her, my girlfriend told him to Fck off! and should have said to him then about me but didn't. A week later he had a nervous break down and upped and left his wife, got his own place and has been pestering her to get with him, probably because he thought she was still single and thought there would be a chance.

My girlfriend has been looking for a way out of her home with her husband and wants to get a divorce but she knows this is going to cost her a fortune and she only earns 750 a month.

She hasn't known what to do. She was thinking, "do I go to this 52 year old man who has the money to take me and my daughter away from my life but I dont really love him" or "do I go with this 28 year old who I love more than anyone she's ever loved, makes her so happy and daughter thinks is excellent, but isn't rich". She said to me If I hadn't been seeing her she would have gone straight to him and she feels guilt that he left his wife for her. Turns out he was gonna leave his wife anyway as the marriage was dead.

Well, saturday she was crying to me and didn't know what to do, I said to her that all I want for her is to be happy, whatever she chose to do. She said she knows how she feels (wants to be with me because she loves me, and I love her), well anyway saturday night she calls me and says that she wants to be with me forever and she is gonna tell this other bloke to get lost because she's in love . Had a great time with her last night from 5pm to 11pm :twisted: Really do love her.

Right, this is where it get complicated , I hve been asked out by another girl and have arranged to go out for a drink on wednesday, she is 19 and very fit!!!.

Girlfriend said to me on sat night "do you trust me because I totally trust you?" I said "yes, totally" as I was recieving texts from this other girl.

What do I do guys? Do I try and keep both happy! I know I love my girlfriend more than anyone else I've ever been with and I think about her all the time but I also want to take this other girl out. :?
Its only a drink after all!
Just digging myself a big hole aren't I!

Anyone else have this dilema before, bet it wasn't as complicated as mine.

If I was left to my own choice I would take both on and buy shares with viagra

Told you it was gonna be a long thread

J

BigDaddy

I voted for Whoa mate, what a hole you've dug, aint got a clue what you should do?!
Sorry you have dug yourself into a hole.

The right thing to do would be tell the 42yr old to go with the other guy who could sort all her problems out and you date the 19yr old.
Your still only a young man yourself with loads of living to be done, really can't see you getting to do it with a 42 year old with son and daughter.

Easy for me to say this but i know it would be harder for you to do, go for the drink with the 19yr old and see how it goes from there, if you like her then go for it, but let the 42yr old know it over or to go to the other guy.

Hope everything works out for you, keep us updated

mrheh

If you really love her then stay faithful... It sounds like you really get on with each other and have built up a good relationship. It sounds like you don't really know this other girl that well and are considering her based on appearance alone... she might turn out to be super annoying or dumb or whatever... just realise if you are gonna try going for her then it's gonna be taking a chance - you already know what u have with your current girl.

Anyway, good luck with whatever u decide.

Anonymous

i,ve had a bad dilema like this before j, not quite the same, so i no how you feeling abit,

how long you known this 19 year old for? it seems like its lust, and whats lust when it comes to someone you love?

if you love your girlfriend stay with her. you can get through this. can she not move in with you?

i reckon if you did see the 19 year old keep it quiet, cos it would hurt your girlfriends feelings, and she may not want you back, and then you split with the 19 year old and bang you got no one bro.

but then i dont no your girlfriend so wouldnt no how she would react.

be careful buddy

steve

Give the new girl a good seeing to!
Older people are okay for experiance but trust me mate, in a few years you'll realise how much less and less you have in common.
Life isn't a rehearsal, there's no second chances. Do what ever you want to do to make yourself happy.

Comando Tom

Im one of those people who think you need to be of a very similar age, your GF is to old and you will get bored, and the 19yo is just looking for a shag. I dont think any of them will last (if thats what you want).

Im not going to give you advise as its your life, you know what you want in a girl and you know what type of relationship you want.


But if I were id go with the 19yo. Because, Im not a trusting person, the 42yo has had to many ups and downs and is in a dodgy state of mind with 3 different blokes in her life.

redspy

As an old friend of mine in the TA used to say "every hole is a goal!" :twisted:

I would see the 19yr old and have some fun.

razg

If you're with the older woman because you feel bad given her situation (which isn't very nice), then that's not something that will last. If however you genuinely care, stay with her.

If it's just a case of getting some ass, see the younger one. That said, don't tempt yourself if you don't plan on straying.

9519sam

if you do it you will get caught! and the girlfriend is at an age where she dont wanna be messed around by a bloke especialy not for a 19 year old girl!

i was never happy unless i was juggeling 2 women, in the end it cost me

no matter what they say all women are the same and can dump on you at any minuite for no reason!

end of the day you dont wanna end up single so if you think the 19yo is up for time then maybe give it a shot

or get the GF to go with the rich bloke and still jump her on the side with the oldmans cash, wile you go out with the 19 yo and work your way through her mates

Sam

GTForce

I'm sure your girlfriend is very attractive, however, she is 42.

People often say that age is just a number, but really, is does play a huge role. Perhaps you do not want children at this point in your life, but you may change your mind when you're 35. By that point your GF will be turning 50!

I would be honest with the 19 year-old and tell her you have a GF.
I would then think long and hard if you really want to commit to a middle-aged woman while still in your 20's.

If you lose the 19 year-old, who cares. I'm 35, and married, and I still get hit on by 21-26 year old girls. There all over mate, plenty to chose from.

This situation demands character...anyone can just be a dog and hump anything they can straddle. Be a stand-up guy zx9rjas

Take care,
GTForce